Howdy, I'm Clyde, chief wrangler in the employ of the marvelous
TeyVey-A-Tuba, the Digital Diva of Channel Surfing.
It's my job to keep an army of electrically-charged creatures
called "Zappers" on track so they can deliver the planet's TV
signals to their proper destinations, so that TV viewers
everywhere can flawlessly switch from one channel to the next to
obtain their favorite TV shows.
The Zappers are binary herds of zeros and ones.
There are billions of them, but you'll never see them because they're the size
of an atom.
Now some of you might ask how do I see these Zappers. Well, Superman has X-Ray vision and I
have electromagnetic and microscopic vision. There ain't a Zapper
been born that I can't find. And believe me, they can be tricky
With my ability to teleport instantaneously anywhere on the globe,
I keep those digital doggies rollin', rollin', rollin' 24 hours a
day, 365 days a year. And, if they get out of line, I snag 'em
with my trusty electro-lasso or corral them with a crack of
my rawhide whip.
To give you some idea of who I am and what I like, here is some
personal information you might find useful. Happy trails, pardner.
- As old as I want to be. And that' all I'm saying.
My Favorite Color:
My Favorite Movies:
- Willy Wonka (The Oompa Loompas are close friends of mine)
- Magnificent Seven
- Enter the Dragon
- Lord of the Rings Trilogy (Frodo's the man...eer "Hobbit")
- Jeremiah Johnson
- The Outlaw Josey Wales
- How the West Was Won
- The Terror of Tiny Town
- Billy the Kid Vs. Dracula
My Favorite TV Shows:
- Little People Big World
- Little House on the Prairie
My Favorite Songs:
- Shock the Monkey - Peter Gabriel
- Whip it - Devo
- It's a Small World - Robert & Richard Sherman
- I'm a Man - The Yardbirds
- Back in the Saddle - Aerosmith
- Baby Got Back - Sir Mix-A-Lot
- Desperado - The Eagles
- Bad Company - Bad Company
- Ballad of Davy Crockett - Bill Hayes
- Riders on the Storm - The Doors
I like to sneak inside TV programs and eavesdrop on the plot. The next time
your watching a program, keep an eye on the background. I'm often mingling with
extras on the show. Because I'm so small, it's easy for me to hide behind a bush
or a piece of furniture. You can look for me on shows like LOST, HEROES, CSI,
BONES and NCIS (That Abby is such a hottie!).
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