Burger King Cowboy
- Singing cowboy who strums a guitar and sings the praises of the
Tendercrisp Bacon Cheddar Ranch Sandwich sold at Burger King
fast food franchise. Dressed in a rhinestone cowboy suit like
Cowboy Curtis on a PEE WEE HERMAN SHOW, Darius Rucker (a.k.a
"Hootie", the lead singer of Hootie and the Blowfish) plays the
lead cowpoke and sings parody lyrics based on the
1920s Depression-era bluegrass song "Big Rock Candy Mountain."
written by Harry McClintock.
As Hootie sings, the viewers are
given a peak at an Oz-like fantasy landscape filled with colorful plastic horses, blossoming burger-trees,
yellow
bricks of butter, girls hula-hooping with giant onion rings,
busty milk maids sampling milk from their buckets, hot-pants
pretties pumping a railroad sidecar and other scantily clad women.
B celebrities featured included FHM's Vida Guerra,
and a bevy of three Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders.
In one scene, E! personality
Brooke Burke is being pushed on a swing by the "king who wants
you to have it your way." At the end of the commercial, she
tells us to "Cooooome aaaaand get it" as she holds
out the sandwich. Directed by David LaChapelle, the commercial
was created by Crispin Porter + Bogusky ad agency in 2004. The
ad spots aired in 2005.
Tendercrisp Bacon Cheddar Ranch Sandwich
(Sung by Darius Rucker)
When my belly starts a-rumblin’
And I’m jonesin’ for a treat
I close my eyes for a big surprise
The Tendercrisp Bacon Cheddar Ranch
I love the Tendercrisp Bacon Cheddar Ranch
The breasts they grow on trees
And streams of bacon ranch dressing
Flow right up to your knees
There’s tumbleweeds of bacon
And cheddar paves the streets
Folks don’t diss front you ‘cause you got the juice
There’s a train of ladies comin’ with a nice caboose
Never get in trouble, never need an excuse
The Tendercrisp Bacon Cheddar Ranch
I love the Tendercrisp Bacon Cheddar Ranch
No one tells you to behave
Your wildest fantasies come true
Dallas cheerleaders give you shaves
Red onions make you laugh instead
And French fries grow like weeds
You get to veg all day
All the lotto tickets pay
There’s a king who wants you to have it your way
That’s the Tendercrisp Bacon Cheddar Ranch
Cooooome aaaaand get it!
