Hag of Haute Couture, The - Self proclaimed title of RuPaul, a 6-foot, 7-inch drag queen who hosted VH-1's celebrity chit-chat program THE RuPAUL SHOW. Other credits of this blond bombshell included the "Foxy Lady" album, spokes-model for MAC cosmetics, and a cameo role as Mrs. Cummings in the film A Very Brady Sequel (1996). See also - "Dame Edna"

Half-Pint - The family nickname of Laura Ingalls Wilder (Melissa Gilbert) affectionately used by her father Charles Ingalls (Michael Landon) on the frontier drama LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE/NBC/1974-82. "Half-pint' is also the real-life nickname of actress Melissa Joan Hart who starred on the sitcoms CLARISSA EXPLAINS IT ALL/NIK/1991-94 and SABRINA THE TEENAGE WITCH/ABC/WB/1996-2003. She's also called "Sa" - derived from "Melissa."

Handi-Man - Handicapped superhero seen on comedy skits on IN LIVING COLOR/FOX/1990-94. Damon Wayans appeared as Clark Bent, a black mailroom man who worked for the Daily Glove newspaper. Clark's alter ego was Handi-Man, a physically challenged superhero with gnarled hands who fought the likes of Doctor Naughty (Jim Carrey), who hated the handicapped because he once received a ticket for parking in a handicapped spot. Handi-man wore a white cap and a handicap-blue costume with a wheelchair logo on his chest. He was occasionally assisted by a dwarfish blonde person called the Tiny Avenger. After vanquishing the bad guys Handi-man said "Never underestimate the powers of the handicapped."

Happy - Jovial moniker belonging to a number of TV characters over the years. On the sitcom HAPPY/NBC/1960-61, Happy Day (portrayed alternatively by twins David and Steven Born) was a baby who mugged for the camera and thought out loud sharing his thoughts of his daily life. On the detective drama MARTIN KANE, PRIVATE EYE/NBC/1949-54 Walter Kinsella played Happy McMann, who owned a tobacco shop where Martin Kane hung out. On the children's sci-fi adventure SPACE PATROL/ABC/1951-52 Lyn Osborn played Space Cadet Happy, the youthful sidekick to Commander Buzz Corey. The military sitcom MCHALES NAVY/CBS/CBS/1962-66 featured Gavin MacLeod as Joseph "Happy" Haines, a PT boat crew member stationed in the South Pacific during World War II. And on episode No. 30 "The Return of Happy Spangler" on the sitcom THE DICK VAN DYKE/CBS/1961-66, J. C. Flippen appeared as Happy Spangler, the man who taught Rob Petrie how to write comedy material. The sitcom SANFORD & SON/NBC/1972-77 featured Howard Platt as Officer "Happy" Hopkins during the 1972-76 seasons. In addition, Happy (and Walter) were two white German shepherds that appeared with Jack La Lanne on his daily TV exercise show THE JACK LA LANNE SHOW/SYN/1956-70.

Happy Homemaker, The - The local Minneapolis TV cooking show produced by WJM-TV Channel 12 on the sitcom THE MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW /CBS/1970-77. The star of the show is Sue Ann Nivens, a.k.a. "The Happy Homemaker" (Betty White) a promiscuous female in her late 40s who uses her culinary expertise to create such savory delights as a multi-tiered low-cal wedding cake with only 82 calories. When not on the air, Sue Ann cruised the hallways of WJM-TV looking for a man to seduce. A frequent target of her affections was blustery news producer Lou Grant (Ed Asner), who finally succumbed to Sue Ann's man-hungry ways, much to his regret. At the close of each segment of "The Happy Homemaker Show," Sue Ann signed-off with such life-affirming sentiments as "A woman who does a good job in the kitchen is sure to reap her rewards in other parts of the house."

Happy Meals on Legs - The terms refers to the citizens of Sunnydale, California on the horror adventure BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER/WB/1997-2003. The Vampire Spike describes ordinary human beings as "Happy Meals on Legs," fast food for the vampires who are attracted to "Hellmouth," a portal to an evil dimension that rests below the town of Sunnydale.

Hardball - The nickname of Dennis Bakelenekoff (John Schneider), a bounty hunter and former professional baseball player on the detective drama GRAND SLAM/CBS/1990.

Hardcase - The nickname of Milton C. Hardcastle (Brian Keith), a southern California judge on the detective adventure HARDCASTLE AND MCCORMICK/ABC/1983-86. Because of his crazy courtroom antics and his tough sentencing policies that proudly proclaimed "Lady Justice is a tough old broad," the judge was dubbed "Hardcase." A fan of the Lone Ranger and the legendary frontier justice of the Old West, Hardcastle yearned for the good old days when the motto of law enforcement was "Hunt 'em, Hear 'em, Hang'em!" When he retired, Hardcastle teamed up with Mark McCormick (Daniel Hugh-Kelly), a former race driver and ex-con (nicknamed "Skid"), to bring to justice criminals who had slipped through the legal system on technicalities. The judge once wore a T-shirt with the words "There's no plea bargain in Heaven."

Hardest Working Man in Show Business, The  See - "The Godfather of Soul"

Hashush-al-Kabaar - The nickname of Uncle Tonoose (Hans Conried), the Lebanese relative (head of the family) of nightclub entertainer Danny Williams (Danny Thomas) on the sitcom MAKE ROOM FOR DADDY/CBS/1953-64. The "Hashush-al-Kabaar" was Lebanese for "The Man Who Made a Monkey Out of a Camel." Tonoose (who loved goat cheese and grape leaves) claimed his family descended from King Achmed the Unwashed.

Hatpin Mary - A wild, bespectacled old lady who took special delight in sticking her un-favorite wrestlers with a deadly "hatpin" during the televised wrestling events during the 1950s. See also - "Gorgeous George"

Hawkeye - The family nickname of Captain Benjamin Franklin Pierce (Alan Alda), surgeon assigned to the 4077th Mobile Army Surgical Hospital on the military comedy M*A*S*H/CBS/1972-83. When Pierce was growing up in Crabapple Cove, Maine, his bookworm father named him "Hawkeye" after his love for the frontier fur trapper and Indian scout in James Fennimore Cooper's 1826 novel "Last of the Mohicans." In the novel, the Hawkeye character was also called Natty Bumppo, Leatherstocking, the Deerslayer, and the Pathfinder. The Canadian produced adventure HAWKEYE AND THE LAST OF THE MOHICANS/SYN/1957 starred John Hart as Nat "Hawkeye" Cutler and Lon Chaney, Jr. as his Indian blood brother, Chingachgook. In the 1990s Lee Horsley starred as Nathaniel "Hawkeye" Bumppo in the syndicated adventure HAWKEYE/1994-95 based on the Leatherstocking Tales. TRIVIA NOTE: The State of Iowa's nickname is "The Hawkeye State."

Head Detective, The - The alter-ego of a handicapped police officer seen on a comedy skit called "The Head Detective" on IN LIVING COLOR/FOX/1990-94. Damon Wayans played the role of the Head Detective, so named because all he was...was a head sitting on a pair of shoes with a small pair of arms sprouting from his neck. He worked undercover with a police officer named Adam (Keenan Ivory Wayans) who carried "Head" around in a bowling bag. According to the series script the Head Detective was "Built sort of like a Mr. Potato Head: his hands are attached to flexible rods which come out of his ears, and his head rests on two large floppy shoes. A gun is permanently stuck to the palm of one hand, and a police badge is permanently stuck to the palm of the other. The hands sway up and down on a flexible rod."

Heals With Tools - On episode "Our Tribe" of the rural drama NORTHERN EXPOSURE/CBS/1990-95 local tribal elder Mrs. Noanuk (Rosetta Pintado) rewarded town Dr. Joel Fleischman (Rob Morrow), for his kindness by adopting him into her tribe. At first, Joel refused but then went through the required initiation of fasting, and going into the Alaskan woods at night to search for a vision. Joel was later dubbed "Heals With Tools."

Her Nibs - Billed as "Her Nibs, Miss Georgia Gibbs (she got her nickname from Garry Moore), Georgia Gibbs hosted a fifteen-minute summer musical show entitled GEORGIA GIBBS' AND HER MILLION RECORD SHOW/NBC/1957 featuring renditions of best-selling records (over a million copies sold) played by the Eddie Safranski orchestra. Miss Gibbs was the recipient of her own million selling gold records (which she sang on the show) including "Dance With Me, Henry," "Kiss of Fire," and "Tweedle Dee." Her program was aired on Mondays before the evening news.

Herbert - Pejorative nickname given to starship Captain James T. Kirk (William Shatner) by Dr. Severin (Skip Homeier) and his Hippie-like renegade followers (who renounced modern technology) after Kirk interrupted their pilgrimage to a mythical planet known as Eden on the 1969 episode No. 75 "Way To Eden" on the sci-fi series STAR TREK/NBC/1966-69. Herbert was a minor government official known for his rigid patterns of thought.

Hey Boy - The Chinese manservant who worked at the plush Hotel Carlton in San Francisco during the late 19th century on the western adventure HAVE GUN WILL TRAVEL/CBS/1957-63. Asian actor, Kam Tong played Hey Boy who fetched newspapers or cigars for Mr. Paladin (Richard Boone), a literate gentlemen and bounty hunter. Lisa Lu played Hey Girl, Hey Boy's, female counterpart during the 1960-61 season.

Hitchhiker, The - Nicholas Campbell and Page Fletcher starred as the wandering hitchhiker on the mystery suspense anthology THE HITCHHIKER/HBO/1983-88/USA/1989-93. The Hitchhiker hosted the series (a la Rod Serling) and introduced lurid tales which he picked up during his travels across the USA.

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